Nobody is truly ever ready when it comes to being a parent. Parenting is a job that requires patience, time, and honesty. This is because family is the core of society, making it essential in everyone’s life.
Taking care of a child is, first and foremost, the task of the parents before society. This is because they are the first people that will interact with the child. Hence, instilling a proper attitude and good behavior in them is very important.
For first-time parents out there, you may be scared and excited at the same time to nurture a child. Parents with teens or older children, however, may teach one or two secrets about parenting.
But how do you know when your parenting style is effective? In this article, we’ve listed 12 steps for more effective parenting to guide you on your journey to becoming a great parent:
Children are like a sponge. They absorb most of the things they hear and see. Hence, it is crucial to be a good role model for your child. What they see in you, they will try to copy. According to The Ten Basic Principles of Parenting, children are like us, adults.
They tend to listen to and respect those they trust. Moreover, if you have a good relationship with your child, they will follow you.
As a result, show them good behavior if you want them to show you good behavior in return, too.
For a child to grow up well-mannered, you, as a parent, have to show them how you feel. You have to assure them that you love them unconditionally.
Not only that, but you have to show your emotions, may it be sadness, anger, or distress. Teach them the proper behavior as to how to deal with those emotions.
The child’s socialization skills need to develop early. How to react to different emotions and feelings of theirs or other people’s is vital. Tell them the emotion you are feeling and if their reaction to it is appropriate.
At home, parents usually have the ‘say’ to everything. However, having two-way communication is more beneficial for your little one. So, let your child be heard, and don’t try to shut off your kids when they have something to say.
Active listening will teach your child to communicate with you better. It will show them that you are interested in what they are saying.
According to theCDC, it is beneficial to be attentive when your kid speaks or tells a story. So when you get the chance, look them in the eye and heed their words for reassurance.
Children are lawless species when you let them be. “Discipline for younger children is all about keeping them safe and learning self-control,” says Dinah Torress Castro, a Family Well Being instructor at Cornell University.
Freedom should be limited by the rules you set for them. One great example is the use of technology. If you let your kids watch the television or Youtube or play video games, you set time limits and enforce them.
Children are smart. They remember the rules you set out for them. Do not make a rule that you will ultimately break or change. You have to follow through.
For example, if you set watching television or playing video games to three hours and your child wants more, do not let them.
You must stand by your decision. According to Psych Central’s Ben Martin, being consistent with the rules will make them more effective. However, as your children grow, talk to them about rules and change them as needed and appropriate.
When rules are broken, enforce with consequences. Then, when the time comes and your child is on their own, it will show how you, as a parent, have taught them to deal with consequences.
Their behavior will greatly depend on this. Following laws and regulations daily is needed in society. The way they will live as an adult will reflect their childhood.
However, it is essential to note that harsh, unjust punishments (e.g., physical or verbal) are a definite no. They never work, and your children will slowly grow to despise you if you continuously give them unjust consequences.
Teaching responsibilities is another way to ensure that your child’s socialization skills will improve. You have to make them own their tasks, problems, and solutions.
This helps with self-confidence and prepares them for life as adults. Do not just command them and teach them obedience.
Micromanaging is bad. Let your kids do it on their own. Self-control will develop at this stage. Being responsible will show them that they need to work hard and independently solve problems to achieve success.
In connection with teaching how to be responsible, let your kids earn their success. Children are creative in many ways. They will surprise you! Setting them up for success will make them take responsibility happily.
Enlighten them about goals and ways to accomplish them even though small. Let your children be independent, make their own choices, and give a bit of control in their lives.
If a child succeeds on their own, reward them. Rewards need not be big but must be meaningful to the child. For example, telling them they are doing a great job or that you are proud of them can be more than enough.
Let them feel great about the successes they achieve. Even children want to feel like they matter and that what they do matters.
Giving gifts does not need to be the norm but a tangible reward every once in a while, especially if the accomplishment is major, is significant.
In contrast to success and rewards, it is also vital for your kids to know what is failing.
They cannot always succeed as life is not like that. Let them experience failure. Let them learn how to cope with it.
Guide your kids’ behavior and teach them to communicate what they feel when they fail. Also, let them know that it is okay to fail.
Trying the same task again to achieve a different result should be an option. This will also develop their independence, decision-making skills, and creativity.
Do not fix your child’s problems for them. You have to allow them to make errors and let them know it is incorrect. It is one way for them to understand what is right and wrong.
Moreover, it will shape how they interact with others. It will also establish their moral compass and guide them in life.
Do not forget to have fun with your child. Teach them how to be happy. Let them discover their interests. You can even do it with them to encourage them to do it more.
Having fun with your kid will show them how much you love and appreciate them. Amidst all the rules and the discipline, being happy along the way is important.
Though you will surely encounter problems with communication, behavior, and respect, a spirit of fun and imagination will help teach you how to live life better.
Most parents will tell you that there is no definite right way to parent. Instead, your child’s behavior will depend on how you communicate and interact with them and the rest of the family.
There are no perfect parents, but nourishing and teaching are good for them and good for society. Build their confidence, respect for others, and love for other people and nature, and they will thrive and grow up as good adults and good citizens.